Misunderstood Japanese Blonde Brigade
by Professur
Summary: The horrors that ensue form being a jappy blondie. This is only in 07-ghost because i think Frau has the most lines, but it is a completely pointless crossover, so yeah: read at your own risk.


A/N: This is just something i put together out of complete boredom. It's not supposed to be in character for anyone, nor is it supposed to be really anything except an output for my insanity. And i'm sorry about the poor representation of us ladies in this, but this is just how it turned out. And really, Daisy is like that anyway.

Oh, and i didn't even realize they were almost al dead until the end, so i decided to add that. And, one more, this is in no way supposed to be mean about blondes. I just chose cause in manga people always think blondies are hoods.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own lots of things, but, in order of apperances, let me state: i don't own Kuroko no Basuke with the blue hair friends, i don't own Bleach where apparently people taste like moldy fruit, i don't own X where evil is a very common state for the Monous, i don't own Legal Drug where the dipshit Rikuo resides(though he's actually my fav character in that), i don't own Yami No Matsuei where many failed sexchange potions exist, i don't own Pokemon where Pikachu are free to blow up centers as they please and last but not least, i don't own 07-ghost where there is also an overabundance of evil.

Me: Welcome to my lair, my labyrinth, my home, my cave. I have decided to bring to you today a short little meeting between me and some blondes. Not just any blondes though. JAPANESE blondes. Yup there are many of them(is it only me, or do they like inhabitting anime and manga realms best? Eh, who can blame them.) Anyways, if everyone would introduce themselves, we can start the ball rolling. Popcorn Kise!

Kise: Hi, everyone! My name is Kise Ryouta and i Live in Kurobasu land. It;s quite nice there. In my country, all we do is play basketball, marvel over our odd hair and eye colors, and try to make Kuroko join our school team. I have quite a happy existance there. Popcorn... Ichigo!

Ichigo: Uh, I'm Kurosaki Ichigo and i live in Bleach land. I spend my time between Japan and the soul society. I-

Un-introduced #1: What's-

Me: No talking until you are announced!

Kise: Then i'll ask. What's the soul society?

Ichigo: Um, it's where dead people live.

Kise: Eww, you mean like the ground? Are they zombies? Is it hell?

Ichigo: No, it's not in the ground. It's like another plane of reality. And no, they are not zombies, and no, it is not hell. When people die they- you know what? I don't wanna explain. Popcorn... Kotori.

Kotroi: Hi you guys. My name is Monou Kotori and im from Clamp land, X city to be exact.

Un-introduced #2: Pfft!

Me: Un-introduced #2, Mind outta the gutter and no laughing til you're introduced. Go ahead Kotori.

Kotori: What gutter?

Me: Nevermind, just carry on.

Kotori: Anyways, so i'm from X city and i live a very nice life. Well, sure first my childhood love moved away, hen he came back as an emo, angsty, depresso, then right after that my beloved big brother turns cray cray and decides to destroy the earth, and i guess my love interest was totally more interested in my older brother, who was trying to kill him, than me and i guess i DID get killed by said brother.. but you know besides that, it was all good. Can't complain. Popcorn Kazahaya.

Kazahaya:Tank you, Kotori. Um, well i guess i'm Kudou Kazahaya and i live with Kotori in Clamp land. Actaully, not really. You see, i live in Legal Drug town of Clamp land, and so while we are neighbors i don't actually LIVE with Kotori. Oh, no, i'm stuck with the stupid dickwad , who has some serious people problems, he's never gonna make friends that way, a completely mysterious guy who does nothing all day but wear shades, scratch tha apparently he also sews adn makes sandwiches, and a really pretty man who could kill you in a heartbeat. And while i don't have a homocidal brother, i DO have a twin sister who could at this very moment be lying in wait to kill those around me.

Everyone:...

Kazahaya: Hey, Kotori, wanna switch?

Kotori: I'm sorry Kazahaya, but already being dead, i don't think you'd have much fun as me.

Kazahaya: Can't be much worse.

Kotori: Though there is Hokuto-chan. She's quite nice. For a dead girl.

Me: Ahem. Kazahaya. A food, it's made of corn, it goes pop...

Kazahaya: Oh right! S-sorry. Uh, Popcorn Watari.

Watari: I was wondering when i coming round! Hola everbody! I'm Watari Yutaka, and i am reining all the way from YamYam land, where i am a great scientist of high esteem and all of my experiments always go right. Sometimes.

Un-introduced #3: Liar.

Me: Seriously people, what don't you get about NOT TALKING UNTIL BEING INTRODUCED?! Carry on Watari.

Watari: I will thank you. As i was saying before i was so rudely interuppted by some one i won't mention, my experiments always go well. Why just the other day i came up with a new invention. It can cut through anything, paper, string, tape, fog... you name it! I mean it, i have yet to come up with a name and am taking suggestions.

Un-introduced #2: Try scissors?

Me: OKay, next time this happens, i'm taking out your next comment. Got that everyone?

Un-introduced #3: And we care because.?.

Me: Alright buster, you asked for it! Watari, i think you should name your invention Misujunaki Alexandria Tabooli Insovu The third. Just sayin'.

Kazahaya: But, aren't they already called scissors?

Me: Nope. Must be your imagination.

Watari: Must say, i'm kinda leaning towards scissors myself. I mean, who has ever heard of a word like that?

Me: Your choice, but i must warn you there could be copyright issues with that one.

Watari: Thanks for the heads up. Popcorn Bon!

Un-introduced #3: ...

Me: Oh hurry up.

Un-introduced #3:

Me: I see very nice name.

Un-introduced #3: Popcorn-

Me: What are you doing? I strictly remember saying you can't talk until you introduce yourself, and your last comment was deleted. Seeing as you have yet to introduce yourself, you can not speak. But you know what? You can introduce yourself last, hows that sound?

Un-tintroduced #3:...

Me: Good, at least some ones learning. So i guess i'll popcorn this time. Popcorn... Daisy.

Daisy: Hi everyone, I'm like Daisy. I live in the Pokemon world and, like, am a sensational sister of Cerulean gym. With my awe-striking beauty, i preform underwater plays with my Pokemon and sisters. Well, except Misty cause she's always traveling with this kid named Ash, who is, like, short. And by short, i mean, like, really REALLY short. And he always wears this funny cap that always seems to stay on his head. I bet he has really oily hair and it works as a kind of, like, super glue to keep his unrad hat on. But he does have a really, cute Pikachu so he can't be bad. Of course i do think the Pikachu, like, blew up a center and stuff-

Me: You know Daisy, hate to break it to you, but you are really uninteresting. KNow what that means? YOU'RE OUTTA HERE. But popcorn the next person if you please.

Daisy: Popcorn, like, the really tall blonde guy.

Me: Wow, Daisy how distinctive, what wiht us being in a room filled with blonde people. He has a name.

Daisy: Popcorn Frau, whatever. I'm outtie.

Frau: I'm Frau.

Kise: Just Frau?

Frau: As far as your concerned, yes.

Me: Frau, Also known as Un-introduced #2. Would you like to carry on yourself Frau, or shall I?

Frau: Go ahead.

Me: Frau is a ghost who has a scythe that wants to eat this boy that Frau himself May or may not want want eaten depending on his mood. He is a major lech, super annoying, wet the bed til he was-

Frau: FINE I'LL DO IT JUST SHUT UP!

Me: Thank you.

Frau: Im tall. Im handsome. Im blonde. Im dead. All the ladies want me. Done.

Kotori: OOOoohhh, are you a vampire?! I've always wanted to meet one.

Frau: Wow, Koroti, i forgot you existed.

Me: You forgot so much you even fogot her name. It's KoToRi. Get it right. And yes, Kotori, he is a vampire.

Frau: WHAT NONSENSE ARE YOU SPOUTING?! IM NOT A VAMPIRE, YOU KNOW THAT! YOU EVEN ALREADY STATED I'M A GHOST!

Me: Oh, shoot, I hoped you'd forgotten that as well. Along with your vampireless status. Oh well.

Kotori: Aw, i wish a vampire did come here.

Me: Can we get on with it?

Frau: Popcorn... Hey there's only one person left.

Me: Huh, would you look at that. I guess you can introduce yourself UN-introduced #3.

Hisoka:... My name is Kurosaki Hisoka. I live in the Yami no Matsuei world and i'm a shinigami.

Ichigo: No way! There is another shinigami named Kurosaki?! How come i've never heard of you?

Hisoka: Maybe because we live in different worlds? Get a grip. I've never heard of you before, but you don't see me freakin out.

Watari: Bon, that would be because you only freak over weird things. Like talking cactuses. And you forgot to mention you work with me!

Hisoka: No i didn't. Why would i want to mention something like that?

Kise: Wow, somethign just occurred to me. Now, Frau said he's a ghost, and ghost's are dead. i get that. And, while she didn't say she's a ghost, Kotoricchi clearly stated she's dead as well. And, Hisokacchi said he's a shinigami, who last i checked are dead. And if he works with Wataricchi, that makes Wataricchi a shinigami and therefore also dead. And then, if Ichicchi is in the same profession, even though he said soul reaper, that makes him also dead. Right?

Ichigo: Same job, different word. But i'm not really dead. Half-dead would be a better term, i guess.

Kazahaya: Wait a minute. Does that mean everyone but me and Kise-kun are... dead?

Me: Excuse me, but last i checked, im not dead.

Kise: Well, that makes three of us.

Kazahaya: We aren't gonna be... cursed, are we?

Me: Kazahaya! How rude! These are just dead japanese people. They aren't zombies or evil spirits. Well, Frau might be, but i'm sure we'll be fine. He doesn't really count as Japanese anyways.

Frau: Hey! I am not evil!

Me: You know what? This is getting us nowhere. Kazahaya- They are dead, but that does not mean they will kill you, eat you alive, curse you, or harm you in any other way. Frau- You are evil. Get used to it. Aahh. Now that that is cleared up, lets move forward. You guys might not remember but this IS about troubles that being blonde has caused you.

Kotori: Really? Is that why we're here? I was beginning to think it was an all dead get together.

Me: Then why would me, Kise and Kazahaya be here?

Kotori: Well, i was starting to think we were gonna... make you dead.

Kazahaya: That's it! I'm leaving!

Frau: You know, for once you might be onto something girl.

Me: Ugh, Kazahaya, sit back down. They aren't going to kill us. You guys maybe, but me? No way. So there is nothing to worry about.

Kazahaya: Wow i feel looaads better. Thanks for the pep talk.

Me: Welcome. Kise, back to what we were doing?

Kise: Troubles with being blonde, huh? Must say, i've never considered myself blonde.

Frau: Then what did you consider yourself? Ya look blonde to me.

Kise: Well, Kurokocchi was robins blue, Aominecchi was dark blue, Akashicchi was red, Midorimacchi was green and Murasakibaracchi was purple, so i just thought of myself as yellow.

Kazahaya:... Your friends have blue hair?

Kise: Yup! Don't lots of people?

Me: C'mon Kise, Issues with being yellow then.

Kise: Can't think of- Wait i got one! When i was little, becuase of my yellow hair everyone wanted o call me Mellow Yellow. But believe it or not, I was a kinda spazzy kid.

Frau: We believe ya.

Me: Frau, put a sock in it. Anyways, as you were saying?

Kise: So they all had this nickname for me, but then i didn't fit it so they ll got really mad at me. And then when i decided to become a model, none of them supported me. But i have a hunch that that was because they were jealous because im pretty.

Me: You know, kise? I bet you're right. That must have been tough. Glad you pulled through. Gonna popcorn?

Kise: Popcorn Wataricchi!

Watari: Ooh! I got one! I got one! Because i'm blonde, lots of people seem to think im dumb. And then they get so surprised when i tell them i'm a scientist of great success. But then for some odd reason, after they talk to Bon a bit, they give me pitying looks. Why is that, Bon?

Hisoka: I just inform them of your success to fail rate. It clears things up.

Watari: I see. My successes must astonish them so much that they don't understand why i don't get awars left and right. Im just a misunderstood genius.

Me: Watari, don'r worry. I understand your genius, even if no one else does. Care to popcorn?

Watari: Thanks for thta boost of support. Glad to know there is someone just as brilliant out there. Ok how about... Popcorn Kotori!

Kotori: Blonde troubles... Hmm, well the only thing i can think of is maybe Kamui would have liked me beter if i wasn't blonde? I mean, Fuuma isn't blonde and he gets to play with Kamui all the time. He's even evil. Hey! I bet you and him would get along then Frau-san!

Frau: WHY DO YOU KEEP INSISTING IM EVIL?! I AM PART OF THE CHURCH!

Me: Ignoring that strange outburst of lie, Kotori, i don't think Kamui likes Fuuma because he isn't blonde. Well, maybe he prefers brunettes, i don't know, but i think it's just fate's cruel sense of humor again.

Kotori: You mean like how i died?

Me: Exactly.

Kotori: Oh, foolish fate.

Me: Tell me about it. I should totally have a kai by now but noooooo, fate is mean.

Kotori: I understand. I should have Kamui by now.

Me: Yeah, not the same but close enough. Popcorn?

Kotori: Popcorn... Evil Frau-san.

Frau: WHAT THE HELL?! GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS! I. AM. NOT. EVIL!

Me: You just keep tellin yourself that. Problems with being a blonde?

Frau: NOTHING!

Me; I see. You don't consider being evil to be a problem. That could be a blonde problem, not sure.

Frau: Stop making stuff up!

Me: I will if you share a blonde problem of yours. And it can't be you don't consider being evil a problem, as we already know that one.

Frau: Fine! For some reason, because i'm blonde everyone seems to think im a pervert.

Me: Is that cause you possbily are?

Frau: NO! I swear if i didn't have blonde hair, No one would call me a lech. Then i could do what i want without interference.

Me: Hate to break it to you bud, But i don't think people calling you a perv has got jackshit to do with you being blonde.

Frau: Hey! How come with everyone else you were all sympathetic but to me you're like "It's all in your head, man."?

Me:That is cause all their problems are really from being blonde. Yours is from being icky. Big diff.

Frau: UGH, i give up! Popcorn Kazahaya.

Kazahaya: But, I'm not blonde.

Everyone:...

Me: OH YEAH! You're not are you. You just LOOK blonde! But in color, your hair is totally brown. Yeah, now i remember... Wait, if your not blonde, why are you here?

Kazahaya: ... You're not blonde either.

Me: Ooohhh, Touche. Alright, you are off the hook. Just popcorn already.

Kazahaya: Popco-

Hisoka: What's the point? It's just me left. And i have no problems with being blonde, so i guess we are done here.

Me: OI OI OI! 'Soka, i never gave you permission to end my Mjbb session! Only i hold that power. Besides, shouldn't there be another person still to share their problems with being blonde? Ichigo, right? Where'd he go?

Kotori: BURP!

Everyone:...

Watari: That's kinda gross.

Me: Kotori... i hate to ask but you didn't... EAT Ichigo... did you?

Kotori: Well, i'd never had half-dead guy before. It sounded kinda good.

Kazahaya: YOU SAID NO ONE WOULD GET EATEN!

Me: I said You wouldn't get eaten. And then i cleared that up with "I" wouldn't get eaten. And neither of us did. But...

Frau: So? How'd he taste?

Watari: And you still deny your evilness.

Kotori: A bit like moldy fruit. I like full-living guys better.

Kise: Going cray-cray, as you put it, might just be in your guys' blood.

Me:... You know, i think i'll just be going now. TTFN!


End file.
